The Dating Game
For years I would choose dating partners with whom I wasn’t compatible. I’d see something in them that I liked, and so I’d pursue them, but I’d never really ask myself if they were the right person for me. I never took the time to ask if they had ALL the characteristics I was looking for in a woman?
My problem was that I had never sat down to ponder what it was I needed from a relationship. Today I realize that, as a single man, it’s important that I have a list of all the things I need in a partner. That way I can compare the women I date to the list, to see if they have the things I need from a relationship.
Sounds selfish, right? “Marc’s list…la dee da! Who does he think he is? Does he really think he’s all that?” As a matter of fact, some have accused me of exactly that: arrogance, having the audacity to be so picky as to have a list outlining the “Must-Haves” in a woman.
I don’t think it’s arrogant at all, and I think we should all have a list like mine before we enter the “dating game.” Otherwise disaster lies ahead.
What Kind of List?
My list has 2 kinds of requirements in it: ones that are “Must-Haves,” and others that are “Nice-to-Haves.” The must-haves are the non-negotiables: the things any partner of mine must have for me to be willing to consider a relationship with them. If they lack in even one, then they’re immediately excluded, no exceptions. Period.
“But you may be missing out on the most awesome person in the world if you do that!” I hear this one a lot. My answer? Yes, they may be, but they’re not the most awesome person in the world for me.
Here’s the problem. If I have a list of 14 must-haves (and mine is 14 items long, yes, LOL), and I “settle” for someone who has 13 of the 14 things I want, then I’m going to spend the rest of our relationship trying to change her to meet the missing “requirement.” I’m going to try to convince her that her living up to that one missing thing is in both of our best interests. Now THAT is arrogant, and quite selfish.
In the process, I’m going to grow weary of nagging, she’s going to grow resentful, and the relationship will suffer.
I’m not prepared to compromise. You shouldn’t be prepared to either. None of us should settle for anything less than exactly what we need out of a partner. I don’t have the energy to be bothered trying to change someone else, and I don’t want to be a nag to the point of upsetting another human being.
What Happens if I Settle?
You won’t be happy. You’ll try to change the person, and you’ll become resentful when they don’t meet your expectations. It won’t work. You may stay in the relationship regardless, trying to make it work, convincing yourself this guy/girl is the right one for you, but deep down you know that they aren’t meeting your needs.
I’ve decided that it’s better to be alone for the rest of my life rather than settle for a relationship that doesn’t meet my needs.
Truth be told, I expect the same from my partner. I expect her to have such lofty standards that, should I not meet all her requirements, she won’t settle for a relationship with me. I’d be fine with that. I’d appreciate and respect that, to be honest.
I want a woman who is that picky. You should be that picky, and want your partner to be that picky too. It’s not arrogance: it’s called getting your needs met, and you deserve it.
Who Am I?
My name is Marc Spinoza, and I’m an erotic masseur in the Greater Toronto Area. I offer incall services in my private townhome in Mississauga, a suburb of Toronto. I also offer outcall services, to homes, condos and hotels. I have an entire kit that I travel with, should you wish for me to come visit you.
I offer a sensual and erotic massage experience that you will not soon forget. If you’re in a place where you’re not currently getting your mental, emotional, physical and/or spiritual needs met, consider coming to see me. I’d love to help you out.
What to do From Here?
Make 2 lists. The first is your “Must-Haves.” Don’t hold back. Be rigorously honest with yourself and write down everything that’s important to you in a mate. Then, as you meet potential partners, DO NOT compromise on even one item on your list. If they don’t match the ENTIRE list, then they’re out. Period.
Make a second list with your “Nice-to-Haves” on it. These are negotiable, so if the person you’re interested in doesn’t have one or more of them, they’re not immediately excluded. Just be sure that you’re being 100% honest with yourself and that your nice-to-haves aren’t actually must-haves.
Now, go out and meet people, and don’t settle for anything less than the very best for you!
Want a Massage Experience that Meets Your Needs?
If you come see me, I can promise you that I’ll deliver the very best experience I possibly can. You’ll not be rushed, and I’ll be sure to pay close attention to your needs, wants and desires. I want this to be the very best erotic massage experience you could possibly have.